THE SUBS 'N' DUDS | Number 12 |
REPORT | Mid October 1996 (Never published) |
| Editor: Harold Hark | Melbourne, Australia |
LAMENTATIONS: What is it about the left that so frightens people? The same people who, in the course of their daily lives, carry out social acts which could only be described as left leaning. More accurately, what is it about the left which has caused the right to have exercised a relentless campaign of vilification against it for centuries. To the extent that people have been conditioned from birth to distrust it, to in fact distrust their own nature. Alas, the bad name is invariably given by male members of the right. These unevolved, penis-driven, macho insecures confront the least example of compassion with a fierce derision born of panic at their own unconscious inadequacies to deal with life in all its dimensions. They live in strait-jackets of ideology, eliciting responses to life situations which are rigid and blinkered. Evolution has passed them by, leaving them with one simple, short term goal: the accumulation of wealth through power. The Left, meanwhile, is burdened with all the other facets of life, distracted, as it were, from petty boardroom finagling with real-time considerations of what it means to have quality of life. In this light, it is no wonder that right wing death squads are so efficient while the Left never gets it together: how can you shoot the tyrant if you're worried about the trauma visited upon his wife, his children, his dog? (So-called left wing terrorism has the same root as its right wing counterpart. Both are based in a fundamentalist, ultra-conservative fear of freedom of expression and diversity.) Unfortunately, in a world which has been formatted with an operating system based on stasis rather than a continuous upgrading of intellect, the Right holds all the power. The division within our species appears to be set in stone. Buddha, Jesus Christ and Mohammed were unable to set a course of harmony; the philistines and barbarians are still in charge. From lifetime to lifetime, the struggle remains the same. WHERE'S ME TABLETS! • Mick Dodson said it: "Since when has prejudice and ignorance become an acceptable basis for formulating Government policy"? To wit, The Age reports racism is on the rise. It's always been there, of course--Australians are no different than other people--but now that the Coalition Government has broken the convention of a 'fair go,' the seeds of an intolerance born of EconoRat inequity are being sown. Yet again, Australia has been brought in line with the rest of the world. We can look forward to a pretty mean future. • Have you noticed that every time a Liberal Politician is interviewed about policies which suck what is left of the fat on the bones of the poor, he or she is inevitably at a business luncheon or dinner? While these Ministers of the Kakistocracy (government by the worst citizens) confidently chat away, the background is soothingly filled with the clink and tinkle of expensive cutlery encountering beautiful soup bowls and plates. This is the sound of self-satisfaction, of legalised crime. It is the sound of exploitation, of cunning and deceit. It is the sound of Australia's ruling elite, the KKK, the Klinking Kutlery Klan! • "You've got Jeff Kennett to blame for this," said an officer of the wrong ambulance sent by Intergraph to the home of Ms Theone Cheong, whose husband, Keith, died as a result. Why does the Kennett government refuse to admit that American-owned Intergraph is a failure? Either their investment is too large, or there is something in it for them. The rest of us are copping anxiety and the possibility of death. As usual for no good reason! • Charge nurse at Monash Medical Centre is stood down for failing to meet new budget limits which are beyond her control. Rob Knowles, invoking the Coalition motto: DENY EVERYTHING, blames the winter for excessive emergency delays at the Centre. Jeff Kennett pops up on Neil Mitchell's 3AW to restate his government's position that fiscal responsibility will always override the sentimental bleating of nurses and other weak sisters. Nurses threaten strike anyway, and win. Said Australian Nurses Federation assistant secretary, Ms Hannah Sellers: "...if this same stunt is pulled by some other manager in some other hospital next time they (the nurses) won't be so ready to walk back." • If AM, The World at Noon, and PM are neutered or removed altogether, the cat will really be out of the bag. The Federal Government, in collusion with ABC management will have effectively silenced dissent in Australia. Two-Bob Watch: Pauline Hanson, the Empty MP With a face twitching from psychopathic hatred, Pauline Hanson stares chillingly at the cameras of Today Tonight. Jill Singer, her interviewer, tries to stay calm (or keep from laughing), but many in the television audience feel an instinctive urge to grab the remote, as if something akin to the devil were looking at them. Not since Larry McNiven, Gympie's Mr Genetic Garbage, have Australians been treated to such steaming malevolence. Looking as if someone once tried to pull the right side of her face off, Pauline's eyes are reminiscent of the zombies in that old cult favourite, "Night of the Living Dead." Indeed her murky sockets are not unlike those of Richard "Frankenstein" Alston. (And who can forget John Hewson, "the man with the empty eyes"?). It is frightening to realise that a significant segment of the human population, the ones who are now coming out to champion Hanson's racist xenophobia, are what could only be described as 'undead,' or 'uncreate'. They are factory rejects who should be recalled immediately because of the greatest defect of all: they were made without souls! Like David Irving, who believes the Holocaust was fabricated, Pauline Hanson believes Aboriginal poverty is no less a fabrication. These people are like stroke victims whose visual field has been impaired by half. They are simply unable to comprehend what is so obvious to the healthy. Is it wildly inaccurate to conclude that the Hansons, Irvings and McNivens of this world are in some way impaired? Their perspectives most definitely are. Finally, why wouldn't Pauline answer Jill's question about the birthplace of her grandparents? Speculation will get us nowhere, but someone ought to get on the case toute suite. Sir Bully and Lady Bubbles in: Sir Bully always has great fun in Parliament. But then, life as the Unassailable One is a hoot everywhere. With a majority of the people applauding His antics like robots in a studio audience, His braggadocio is truly without limit. He can say or do anything He wants without fear of reprisal, such as shovelling sand at an irritating media to the laughter and applause of our once proud state's legalised Mafia. He can pass laws or repeal them, raise taxes and then raise them again, all on a whim. His canon: Deride, Slander and Deny, has served Him well on the road to power. Fostered by a stint as Sergeant-Major in the country's Play Army, that glorious time when He honed His talents of bullying by inspiring fear and potential suicide in young cadets who thought they were there to become men and have fun, He went on to comprehend that forceful slander gets you places. And the people love it. Since proclaiming Himself Saviour of the World, His Unconsciousness has served up any number of juicy condemnations, and although He may not always realise what He is saying, the people still thrill to His contemptuous showmanship. Indeed, when He said of the Shadow Minister for Health, "...you were preening yourself in Paris and showing everyone how pretty you were. You are too pretty," He had perhaps forgotten His witty question of the Leader of his Toy Opposition a few years back, "Do you sleep with boys? Well, do you?" Well, never you mind, Sir Bully Floggit may indeed be a closet nancy, but the people, living as they do with brief attention spans and no desire to put two and two together, will never catch on. After all, He represents the greatest of their infantile desires: the triumph of instant gratification over responsibility. |
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