THE SUBS 'N' DUDS | Number 7 |
REPORT | 5 July 1996 |
| Editor: Harold Hark | Melbourne, Australia |
Thwaites Thwarts Thugs (25 June 1996) Did you see their faces on television? Senior Magistrate of the Children's Court, Jennifer Coate, Chief Magistrate, Michael Adams, QC, and Attorney General, Jan Wade. Each denounced as appalling, astonishing, and disgraceful, the leaked release of Ches Baragwanath's draft report on the role of the Children's Court in child protection. Coate, with contained apoplectic rage, dismissed the report as being "prepared by an accountant assessing the judicial functions." Adams, clearly a government lackey, read a prepared statement through pinched lips, claiming the report "offended the principle of judicial independence". Wade, with her customary pallor of denial, refused calls by the Law Institute for a judicial inquiry. Are these people evil? Or are their lives so narrow they have lost touch with even the air they breathe. Isolates living in fear of being found out for their treacherous incompetence. WHAT ABOUT THE CHILDREN? The Kennett Government, already accused of numerous crimes against democracy, now stands accused of child abuse. Passive, dismissive, all-self-important child abuse. And they will not act until their timetable suits them. No new premises until 1998. The children simply don't count. We do not wish to mount this appeal on emotion alone, but damn the political-legal wrangling. The people of Victoria (and Australia, the world) demand that children who are abused or run foul of the law be looked after in a caring, humane manner. These are the demands of civilisation ! THERE IS NO OTHER ISSUE HERE. Any judicial system that would seek to suppress the information contained in the A-G's report (draft or otherwise) is not worth having. Indeed, this criminal government would sweep it all under the carpet, using self-serving technicalities to escape responsibility. Justice Fogarty is sadly correct in saying they will simply go into damage control until the media stops writing about it. Meanwhile, it's business as usual--building the Casino of Babylon directly across from the hovel used as the Children's Court. What an indelible symbol of the Kennett Government's priorities! WHERE'S ME TABLETS! Fiction writers working on a political blockbuster would be hard put to come up with the likes of Clueless John's Treasurer, Peter Costello. His performance before, during and after the recent Premier's conference earns him a place beside Jeff Kennett at the eventual Mussolini Memorial Hanging. For surely, here are two who deserve to be hung by their heels in the public square. Poor Mrs. Costello. Still, she has one son to be proud of. Like an old Hollywood movie starring Pat O'Brien and John Garfield, the brothers Costello are acting out the classic duality of good and evil. While Tim has become a man of the cloth and a courageous fighter for democracy and human rights, Peter has grown up to be an opportunist, the son who took the dark path of power and control, opting for a Machiavellian life of straightening and punishing. And what a figure of smart-arse darkness he has become. His expression, frozen in a condescending smirk, is bestowed on all, friend or foe. He's like the proverbial used-car salesman who ridicules the wary and despises the chumps. Peter Costello is the overseer of a heartless ideology which would turn Australia into a Banana Republic. The EconoRat elite will be riding high on voodoo economics while the rest of us live in economic ghettoes, eking out our reduced-wage, hidden-taxed lives with nothing left over to pursue the interests that befit our humanity. As Janet McCalman said in her column in The Age of 26 June 1996 (perhaps the ultimate summation yet of the destruction of human cultural enterprise this country is now undergoing): "The true believers in the 'lean, mean' way of life, where competition rules, have a miserable notion of human nature." • Evelyn Tsitas writes in the Herald Sun (20/5/96) on Citipower's astonishing policy regarding dwellings which front directly on a footpath and whose meters therefore are located inside. They require, she writes, either 1) a copy of the front door key to be kept on file, or 2) someone to be home to let the meter reader in. Ms Tsitas comments in no uncertain terms about her hesitancy to provide free access to her home to an employee of Citipower or anyone else, and the absurd suggestion that she should take a day off to wait for the whenever arrival of said employee. • Maria Harris reports in the Progress Press (21/5/96) that five months after Boroondara's introduction of laws requiring dogs to be on leashes in public parks, the dogs are still running free. The reason? Signs advising people where dogs should be leashed, have been delayed. Why? Because the sign company was busy making signs for the Grand Prix. Say, wouldn't you give your child's arm to a pit bull on behalf of the Grand Prix? Democracy v. Business, Kennett Style Bernie Finn, Thumpwit for Tullamarine, has urged Labor MPs to repudiate Pete Steedman's suggestion that the ALP dump 20 State and Federal MPs to "reinvigorate" itself. The noble Mr Finn's reason: Save taxpayers the cost of byelections. MEANWHILE: Bernie's Coalition Government has stolen $9500 from taxpayers in the form of a painting given to Ken Baxter for breaking his $270,000 contract as Public Service Assassin. Had Mr Baxter gone the full five years, he would have been due a bonus of $150,000. But he quit after 2 1/2. Therefore: No bonus ? Not so said Jeff "Silvio" Kennett. MEANWHILE: Crown Casino made off with between $194 and $259 million of taxpayer money by paying a mere $85 million licence fee on the extra 150 tables generously awarded by Finn's Coalition government, read Jeff Kennett. ERGO: Save a few thousand dollars at the expense of the democratic process, while routing millions to Coalition mates at the expense of community well being. Sir Bully and Lady Bubbles in: While Sir Bully was in Greece to represent Himself at the funeral of Andreas Papandreou, His vivacious wife, the Lady Bubbles, signed on with Network Umeruhca to travel the country as a reporter on the popular '90's lifestyle show, The Stealthy Get Wealthy and Collect the Prize. As His Eminence Umeruhcanises our once proud state through ongoing funding cuts to every sector except big business, Lady Bubbles, eschewing priveleged idleness, will be doing her bit at the popular Umeruhcan television subsidiary. And isn't she lucky. Because of scant time alloted to content filler, Lady Bubbles will naturally have more fun than work. A few minutes of well coached sincerity and cheery banter each week will be just what the producers need to keep viewers from getting up and wandering around aimlessly during commercial breaks. During the program's main entertainment--advertising--she'll be only too happy to hop offscreen during worthwhile promotions of the Grand Casino, pokies for housewives, tampon tips for Alice-bands, cereals for dimwitted teenagers, and banking schemes to further impoverish the impoverished. We're glad the First Lady has found something exciting to do, now that profits from insider trading have become a no-no. Who knows what's in store for her in the future? Whatever it might be, let's hope Ruby Wax is on hand to give us the low down. |
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