SCUM AT THE TOP

"Umeruhca"
by Jerzy Wiçiçiwiç

JERZY WIÇIÇIWIÇ's reply: "Normally I would take an indignant stand regarding the ridiculous accusations of Harold Hark. However, hearing the news of his decision to retire SCATT has left me in a more serious mood. Whether one agrees with his comments or not, Australia is losing a keen and intelligent observer of right wing politics. His remarks have shredded the curtain of arrogance and corruption surrounding many of Australia's powerful politicians. His razor sharp comments will be truly missed. On behalf of the entire staff of The Squiz we wish Mr. Hark our best in his future endeavors and we are all relieved that he will still remain as editor-in-chief.(Did he call me a plagiarist? Why that *%@^# !)"

HAROLD HARK's reply: "How dare you not insult me! I'm a tough guy, an Aussie! We eat crocs for brekkie and dice UmErUhcans for tea. We like insults. Instead, what do I see but a moving tribute. I'm not not paying you for this kind of maudlin crap! If I wanted to hear kind words I'd turn to my wife (um . . .) or my daughter (er . . .) or my little dog (uh . . .). Ah, the hell with it. Thanks for joining SCATT however briefly. But now I see that you're going to hang around while I weasel off. Trying to make me look like a coward? Bloody revoltin' development..."

Los Angeles Braces For The Onslaught

Rodney King, the riots of 1992, the Northridge earthquake, the OJ Simpson trial, and now the Democratic National Convention. The city fathers are beginning to regret their successful bid to hold the Democratic Convention this year at the brand new Staples sports arena in downtown LA. In addition to the thousands of delegates, participants, and observers who will be descending on LA the week of August 14th, over 15,000 of the world's press will be buzzing throughout the city covering not only the convention but also the predicted protests. Between 10 and 40,000 activists are threatening to be present, including the same group of World Trade protesters that turned Seattle into a war zone last year. The city has roped off a wide perimeter around the Staples Center and set aside designated areas for protesters many blocks away from the convention site. These areas have already been called "protest pits" and the activists are not buying it. While most protest groups have claimed they wish only for the opportunity to exercise their first amendment rights without violence, some have expressed the use of any action to bring public attention to their cause.

The mayor has written a long diatribe in the LA Times warning all protest groups that they will be welcome to express themselves in an orderly fashion ... but zero tolerance will be the rule for troublemakers. Nate Holden, LA city councilman, has already said, "If they come wanting to cause trouble . . . let 'em come! Let 'em try! We'll be ready." This kind of political grandstanding can only strengthen the determination of some of the more violence-oriented protest groups.

All of this is happening in the wake of the worst corruption scandal in the history of the Los Angeles Police Department. With the recent sacking of many officers with many yet to come, the US Justice Department has promised to put the LAPD under a microscope during the convention.

With the seething anger of the cops on the street, angry protesters ready and willing to put their heads in Harm's Way, the expected heat of August, and some expected power outages, LA has good reason to be concerned. Many residents are making plans to seal their homes and get out of town during the week. Others plan to watch the show on TV in the air-conditioned comfort of their locked homes. Few plan on being anywhere near the downtown area. Lets hope their concerns do not become a reality. LA can scarcely afford another disaster. Already, the mayor is stunned with the projected police overtime bills to assure order while many protest groups state emphatically that they plan on fanning out through the widespread city.

That LA is not prepared for this event is an understatement. Stay tuned.

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William Jefferson Clinton Calls For Mideast Summit

In his continuing quest to leave a legacy and to help VP Al Gore Jrs faltering campaign, US President Clinton has called for a 10-day summit at Camp David to bring about a lasting peace in the battle weary Middle East. In spite of the lack of home support, both Barak of Israel and Palestinian leader Arafat reluctantly arrived for the planned 10-day meeting. The end of the summit, with or without an accord, was to end July 17th. Clinton cancelled his plan to visit Japan and extended the summit one more day. Many say that an accord is at hand. Other sources say that an angry Barak plans to leave July 18th because, according to Barak, Arafat has no intention of negotiating peace. Since Clinton has ordered a press black out, it is difficult to substantiate anything.

With or without an accord, The Los Angeles Times reported that both sides are preparing for violence. Barak barely survived a no confidence vote before he left for the summit. It is well known that Arafat does not enjoy widespread support among the Palestinians. Little of the US aid dollars to Palestinians have filtered down to the people. Arafat's elite group is known for open and growing corruption. If an accord is reached between these two weakened leaders it would be dubious at best.

One could ask, "Why do they come?" Money! Both leaders know this to be a political show. For his part, President Clinton feels that with his winning personality and plenty of U.S. tax dollars to throw at the respective leaders in the form of aid anything is possible. "Play Along" (at least until the November elections) is the theme of this summit. Perhaps the "Lets Make a Deal" ambience of the summit should be mediated by Monty Hall instead of Clinton.

The danger of trying to solve the complex issues of the Middle East in ten days is obvious. Violence will erupt regardless of the outcome. My sources tell me that Israel is gearing up for a full-scale war. If Clinton was sincere, his efforts should be to cool down the situation rather than to push the envelope and resolve all issues. Arafat's dangerous threat to declare Palestine a State before the end of the year should be dealt with quickly by skilled negotiators. Perhaps a solution would be down the road but at least a war could be avoided. The ego of the American President is showing. Slick Willie can't solve everything. While both sides look for a fallback position let's hope Clinton doesn't set off a full-scale war!

Now Clinton has gone to Japan, leaving Barak and Arafat to work with Madeline Albright. A forlorn situation that is unfolding as we go to ... it used to be press. Upload?

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Election Campaigns Are Putting The Electorate Asleep

True, it's the dog days of summer but neither Bush nor Gore is creating any significant interest. Bush's easy style and some substantial plans may be the reason he is slightly ahead in the polls.

Both candidates appeared last week before the NAACP. Al Gore came off like a Baptist preacher quoting Scripture and pounding the podium. This rousing speech had little substance. Bush at least apologised for his party's not always being sympathetic to black issues. This honesty surprised and impressed some of the audience.

There is little else to report except promises, promises, promises! Perhaps the respective conventions will turn up the heat on the true differences between the candidates. Perhaps Al Gore Jr will discover who he really is? He made a complete fool of himself on national TV last Sunday with a well-prepared Tim Russert of NBC. His flip-flopping and inability to answer basic questions on abortion was particularly embarrassing.

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Big Brother's Prolefeed

CBS Television, the network that cut its teeth in the 1950's on such quality shows as Studio One, Twilight Zone, Playhouse 90, adaptations from Hemingway, Steinbeck, and Shakespeare, the same CBS whose hallways are still haunted by those great pioneers of TV news like Murrow, Collingwood, and Sevaraid, has debuted a new and successful TV show called "Big Brother."

At their studios on Ventura Blvd in the Valley, they have constructed an 1800 foot compound wherein 10 volunteers, selected out of 1300 enthusiastic morons, have been placed. From the top the compound looks like a rat's maze. There will be no doors on any rooms except the toilet and shower. On Wednesday these 10 strangers started living together with 60 hidden cameras and 200 microphones. Isolated from the general public, with no newspapers, radio or TV, these fools will be observed for two hours on CBS TVevery Wednesday night and 24 hours around the clock on the Internet. Each week viewers will get to vote on which one of the poor bastards will be booted out of the maze. The last one standing will collect $500,000.

Have we all gone mad? The fantasy/science fiction movie "The Truman Show" was released a year and a half and now it has become reality. Orwell's 1984 spoke of "Prolefeed," the manufacture of "rubbishy entertainment and fictitious news" to keep the mindless occupied. Well, here it is in the year 2000. They got the idea from a Dutch show that pulled in landmark ratings. The Brits are starting one in a few weeks, and now NBC has just announced a new "reality" show for the fall. They're multiplying like flies!

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