| Australia's Journal of Political Character Assassination | Melbourne, Australia |
SCUM AT THE TOP | Next Issue: 17 Feb 2001 |
| Editor: Harold Hark | Volume 5 Number 1 |
Frank Lloyd Wright |
We've been away a full six months and, frankly, enjoyed most of it. The effects of summer holidays here in Australia are still coursing through our blood streams at the slumbering rate of a five day test match, but even though the heat is worse than ever and Cricket will go on and on, the time has come to leave the crease and return to real life and its irritating responsibilities. John Howard is still Prime Minister of Australia, but surely by Christmas the misery he has inflicted on this once proud nation will be over. We hope to continue with this bi-weekly report until the poor man is put behind the white picket fence of his droopiest dreams. On a more ludicrous note, George W. Bush is now president of those United States. Nobody wanted Gore either, but the "Greatest Nation on Earth" is nothing but a laughing stock now it has Dubbya at the helm. John Howard. The name is like a recurring nightmare. He's kicked off the year long election campaign with his "Innovations" statement, effectively calling on Australians to forget about the $5 billion he ripped out of education and research and development at the beginning of his disastrous rule. Instead he wants us mugs to think highly of him for putting a measly $2 billion back. And he knows most of us will. Yes, we'll forget and be impressed. Even Melbourne University's Dr Janet McCalman (The Age 31-1-01) says he's on a winner. She, of course, has been one of Howard's more trenchant critics. But well, when the warder finally gives you a few scraps--and you've been so long in solitary that you've forgotten those fine meals you used to enjoy before civilisation was put under threat--you feel gratitude. Perhaps not a gushing gratitude, but gratitude nonetheless. Only that rare person of fearless courage would tell the screw to stuff those scraps up his scrawny arse. Australia has no such person. I'm thinking of Nelson Mandela in South Africa and Alekos Panagoulis in Greece, during the time of the Generals. Alas for us ... So the newspaper columnists are going to be full of praise for The Squidgereen's sudden conversion on the road to an election. They may drop a sentence or two about the blatant hypocrisy, but then again, they may not. And although the dailies run almost back to back stories about the horrors of Philip Ruddock's concentration camps for undesirable aliens, no one seems to be saying that a government capable of not only setting up such places but defending them day in and day out, should not be reelected. Indeed, there is lots of chest beating over the fact that such camps exist in Australia, but the connection to the Howard Government is handled delicately. Why? Like the Germans under Hitler, Australians are unable to face their passive collaboration with fascism. Hot on the heels of the Coalition swearing in ceremonies, in which we were sickened to hear Peter Reith pledging allegiance to the Queen in his new role as Minister for the Defence of the Realm's favourite colony, comes the withdrawal of the almost Employment Services Minister, Mal Brough (and we all know what that rhymes with) for alleged illegal electoral rorting. He was also forced to resigned as parliamentary secretary, a job he actually held. We've lost track of the Labor MP's caught up in electoral fraud, but anyone who thought it wouldn't spread to the Liberals and Nationals is the kind who still thinks John Howard is honest. The kind of lowlife we elect from either party wouldn't know a rort from an invitation to dine with Jesus. It's hard to know just how far all this will go, or even how serious it is in the scheme of things. If we keep electing politicians that have connections to big business, then we will have to accept their potential as crooks. We've said it before: Business is legalised crime. The only difference between the two parties is that Labor is immoral, while the Liberals are amoral. Given the choice, I'll take the immoral crook anytime. He may rip me off, but it's the amoral mob who build concentration camps. The other big story is the theft of the US presidency by the Bush Dynasty's Dauphin, Dubbya the Dumb. In a buried article in The Australian (31-1-01), two US newspapers, the Washington Post and the Palm Beach Post conducted surveys among Florida voters whose ballots were ruled invalid. Both papers reported overwhelming results in favour of Al Gore. However, it will be months before a consortium of newspapers conducts a review of all rejected ballots. In the end the real tally will make little difference to wilfully amnesiac Americans. With attention spans struggling to remember what happened at the beginning of the TV show that's just ended, the wild ride that was Election 2000 will be but a vague memory. Likewise the injustice that saw Gore win the popular vote but lose the presidency will fade, or has already faded, from memory. Instead they will briefly note the passing of the separation between church and state, as Dubbya turns over the welfare sector to Christian fundamentalists. Indeed, Born-again Dubbya is instituting an Office of Faith-Based Action so that "armies of compassion" can take over government responsibility for social services. In line for a handy assignment is none other than Charles Colson. Remember him? He was one of Tricky Dicky's henchmen sent to prison over his part in Watergate. While doing time, clever Charlie started a trend which has seen many a skullduggerer reverse his fortunes: he found personal salvation in Jesus-uh Christ-uh. In one insincere swoop, Colson kept the brown-eye bangers off his arse and secured a future with the religious right. The question is: Will Dubbya continue to toady to far right Christian fundamentalists, or is he just offering them scraps so they will go away? If the answer is yes to the former, then we may soon see America become the Christian equivalent of Iran. Now there is a scenario to strike terror into the heart. But if you think about it, America has been itching to strike out in a kind of dumb shit version of the Crusades ever since Ronald Reagan assured Americans that God, Guns and being one-dimensional meant feeling good about themselves. And the word is that Dubbya is the heir to Ronnie, not his father. Yep, the man who got lousy grades but through the influence of pappy George Sr managed to attend Yale and Harvard; the man who (like our own Jeff Kennett) has all the business acumen of a brain damaged bandicoot; the man whose grasp of the English language is second to millions; the man who routinely spent a couple of hours every day as Governor of Texas and then napped or jogged or played in other ways for the rest of the day; the man who so loves to play executioner he may be America's number one serial killer; the man who, on his first day in office, abolished funding for abortion education in the world's poorest countries; the man who wants a homophobic anti-abortion racist to be Attorney General; the man who is the subject of derision throughout the world ... is now president. Eek! SCATT will keep a squiz on these two "professional politicians, amateur human beings" throughout 2001. Join Harold Hark and Gort Slypesunder every two weeks as they vent their opinionated spleen on Howard, Bush and other conservatives and their mean attempts to defraud the human race of its potential. SCATT highly recommends Michael Moore's "The Awful Truth", airing in America on the Bravo channel, and in Australia on Tuesday nights at 8:30 PM on the SBS. Moore's raids on the headquarters of corporate criminals and his pursuit of Dubbya make cheering viewing. He's a hero of the highest order. Web site: The Awful Truth |
SCUM AT THE TOP is not copyrighted and may be used in whole or in part for any purpose the reader chooses.
Published and distributed by the Political Prisoners of the Future.